Loss this week: -1
Total lost: 7.4 lbs
Let's talk hormones for a minute, shall we? So, a year ago, I started to have some interesting symptoms. My hair was falling out, I had insomnia, I couldn't focus, had hot flashes . . . it was crazy. After a very involved google search, I found a site that listed the 34 most common menopause symptoms, and I had 29 of them. Seriously - at 32 I was having that many symptoms. Not cool.
In February I finally got around to seeing my ob-gyn. To make a long story short - I took the easy route. I could have done a ton of blood work (and had to come back three separate times to draw blood at different parts of my cycle). But we knew that I have low progesterone (that's that whole infertility thing I went through), so we decided to just try taking some. So I'm on this little completely round pill for 2 weeks out of every cycle.
And I love it. My hair loss has slowed way down, I sleep normal, I'm not a crazy person (ok, that last one is relative.) But it does have one nasty side effect: weight gain. I gained two pounds every month while I've been on it.
Guess who started those pills again 5 days ago.
Guys - this week was hard. Seriously, ridiculously, hard. I didn't want to be good - I wanted to stuff my face with whatever I could find. I didn't want to figure out points, or to stay with in them, and so honestly I was so. SICK. of FRUIT!! Plus we celebrated Buddy's birthday AND we had the 4th of July, AND my Hubby decided to go buy my favorite treat too. I knew I should want to be good - but I could barely come up with the desire to want to want to be good.
And I really wasn't that good. I was down right awful a few days. Saturday night I had a good long talk with myself. I knew something was not great here, but why on earth was it being so hard. It didn't take long for me to come to a realization: I had stopped praying for help. Huh. Imagine that - if you stop praying for help, He's going to stop helping! And I realized again the weakness within me. I CANNOT do this on my own. There is just no way.
Yesterday was full of prayers again - both of apology and of help. And it was better . . .but still hard. I know I will only make this goal with His help. So here's to a better week . . . and lots of time on my knees.