Ready

TO start this post off, I'd like to make it perfectly clear that I am NOT pregnant. Ok?  Just so there's no mix up here.


Since I've been married, the majority of my friends have been older than myself.  As I've thrilled with each aspect of being pregnant, they have sighed with relief that it wasn't them. They had their time, but now it was someone else's turn.   It's always taken me back a bit. I've been so excited to be pregnant, the concept of being happy to not be so has been light years off my radar.

But I'm closer to understanding it now.

Last fall, Hubby and I decided to not have a baby in 2011. So of course I got baby hungry the month after we changed our insurance, and have stressed every. single. month. about our choices.

But that deadline is just about up now.

And I'm ready.

I'm ready for my last pregnancy to start.  I thrill at the idea of the last stretch marks. I'm ready to know what color clothes I need to stock.  How happy I'll be for that last catheter!  I'm ready for the last round of "firsts". I'm ready to be done with car seats. To plan the last round of toilet training thrills my soul.  I'm ready to not have little people crawling all over me. I'm ready to start this last trip down babyhood.

I don't know how long this trip will take. Last time it wasn't so great. But I thrill at the idea of finally starting it.

I know that this will be the very last time I go down this road. Physically, I only get four pregnancies, and we plan on doing some permanent choices regarding that.  Waiting these last few months for the timing to be acceptable has been agonizing - I just want to start this path!

I don't know how much I'll talk about it. It will depend on how hard it is this time. I don't think it will be - I know my body and cycles so much more thoroughly now, that I don't expect too much hassle . 

So here's to a new adventure. One I'm very ready to begin!